








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 28 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 363 matches | ||
| Wingman | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 66 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




24 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3508 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 20,866 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6646 | 32% |
| Smokes | 5643 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 5722 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 2855 | 14% |
Our logs show you have wasted $365,100 of utility $39 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 451 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | hARDN6 | 51% | 59 |
| #9 | AcoSaft | 49% | 75 |
| #10 | BrettKollege | 47% | 34 |
| #11 | Jodecutler | 46% | 204 |
| #12 | DeadSprayer | 36% | 28 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jodecutler | 5 | 0.0011 |
| #2 | K1ng♛Eddy | 5 | 0.0051 |
| #3 | AcoSaft | 4 | 0.0025 |
| #4 | Sp33dy2005 | 3 | 0.0034 |
| #5 | hARDN6 | 2 | 0.0016 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jodecutler | 426 | 0.10 | 11 min |
| #2 | K1ng♛Eddy | 175 | 0.18 | 5 min |
| #3 | hARDN6 | 118 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #4 | SenhorVS | 117 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| #5 | rocksstorm | 66 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | rocksstorm | +1.27 | 64 | 63 |
| #2 | SenhorVS | +1.22 | 62 | 51 |
| #3 | K1ng♛Eddy | +1.11 | 39 | 75 |
| #4 | Sp33dy2005 | +0.93 | 55 | 67 |
| #5 | hARDN6 | +0.93 | 54 | 65 |





