








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 975 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 636 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Faceit | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 58 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




32 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6915 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 15,062 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3403 | 23% |
| Smokes | 5066 | 34% |
| HE Grenades | 3571 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 3022 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,286,989 of utility $154 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 219 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | M1xu | 56% | 66 |
| #2 | c̶o̶c̶o̶♡ | 53% | 74 |
| #3 | ★Krys | 50% | 40 |
| #4 | ★LiQu_ | 49% | 57 |
| #5 | CraX | 48% | 61 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | Cadaveri | 44% | 84 |
| #10 | Mauno | 43% | 113 |
| #11 | veljaN | 42% | 184 |
| #12 | IdieH_ | 42% | 52 |
| #13 | rANDOMIHERO'umad? | 42% | 389 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | rANDOMIHERO'umad? | 21 | 0.0025 |
| #2 | veljaN | 7 | 0.0018 |
| #3 | Cadaveri | 6 | 0.0034 |
| #4 | Mauno | 3 | 0.0012 |
| #5 | ★LiQu_ | 3 | 0.0026 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | rANDOMIHERO'umad? | 1458 | 0.17 | 43 min |
| #2 | veljaN | 766 | 0.19 | 21 min |
| #3 | Mauno | 276 | 0.11 | 7 min |
| #4 | M1xu | 180 | 0.13 | 3 min |
| #5 | ★Krys | 179 | 0.22 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | M1xu | +3.31 | 82 | 63 |
| #2 | rANDOMIHERO'umad? | +2.07 | 83 | 78 |
| #3 | veljaN | +1.19 | 69 | 80 |
| #4 | M.Y.S.T.O | +0.62 | 81 | 58 |
| #5 | Tatt[I] | +0.38 | 75 | 51 |





