








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 13 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 125 matches | ||
| Faceit | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1817 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,426 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1726 | 27% |
| Smokes | 1749 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 1373 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 1578 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $507,290 of utility $120 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 46 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | munapussi | 68% | 37 |
| #2 | vomit | 55% | 38 |
| #3 | Tobbe | 54% | 94 |
| #4 | TEPPQ | 50% | 32 |
| #5 | Joonas | 50% | 116 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Herrarar | 11 | 0.0076 |
| #2 | Joonas | 8 | 0.0032 |
| #3 | Tobbe | 3 | 0.0015 |
| #4 | TEPPQ | 3 | 0.0044 |
| #5 | vomit | 1 | 0.0013 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Joonas | 265 | 0.11 | 6 min |
| #2 | Herrarar | 180 | 0.13 | 4 min |
| #3 | vomit | 169 | 0.21 | 4 min |
| #4 | Tobbe | 134 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| #5 | munapussi | 92 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | vomit | +1.45 | 84 | 63 |
| #2 | Joonas | +0.99 | 57 | 57 |
| #3 | seppo | +0.98 | 81 | 52 |
| #4 | Masa | +0.97 | 87 | 64 |
| #5 | munapussi | +0.46 | 72 | 66 |





