








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 194 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 77 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 35 matches | ||
| Wingman | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Faceit | 5 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 26 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1434 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,784 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2644 | 30% |
| Smokes | 1967 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 2398 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 1775 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $610,809 of utility $138 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 70 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Feathers McGraw | 60% | 20 |
| #2 | ChoChoNut | 57% | 56 |
| #3 | Wilma Dickfitt | 56% | 32 |
| #4 | ✪ LoderoYT ⭕⃤ | 54% | 46 |
| #5 | Solidgoose | 51% | 73 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Adster | 11 | 0.0066 |
| #2 | Solidgoose | 8 | 0.0049 |
| #3 | YcL | 7 | 0.0034 |
| #4 | JoshR | 7 | 0.0119 |
| #5 | ✪ LoderoYT ⭕⃤ | 5 | 0.0049 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Adster | 377 | 0.23 | 11 min |
| #2 | ChoChoNut | 269 | 0.21 | 6 min |
| #3 | YcL | 257 | 0.12 | 7 min |
| #4 | Solidgoose | 167 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| #5 | Wilma Dickfitt | 167 | 0.24 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Wilma Dickfitt | +2.04 | 80 | 64 |
| #2 | ChoChoNut | +1.94 | 72 | 60 |
| #3 | Xx_Dats.Da.Wong.hole_xX | +1.72 | 81 | 66 |
| #4 | JoshR | +1.38 | 89 | 63 |
| #5 | 外資系チツドカタ | +0.98 | 55 | 35 |





