








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 141 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 28 matches | ||
| Premier | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




0 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Your loyalty is impressive.
761 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,399 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 511 | 21% |
| Smokes | 700 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 514 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 674 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $184,841 of utility $116 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 39 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ecotic. | 78% | 9 |
| #2 | Prooy | 67% | 6 |
| #3 | druestar | 65% | 17 |
| #4 | Aleks | 64% | 14 |
| #5 | Bollejeger | 60% | 5 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | Crimson0ni | 60% | 10 |
| #8 | E-Bony | 57% | 21 |
| #9 | madzu | 56% | 16 |
| #10 | Marty | 40% | 5 |
| #11 | Beethoven | 20% | 5 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Aleks | 2 | 0.0064 |
| #2 | E-Bony | 1 | 0.0022 |
| #3 | Crimson0ni | 1 | 0.0044 |
| #4 | Bollejeger | 1 | 0.0101 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | druestar | 57 | 0.15 | 1 min |
| #2 | madzu | 38 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| #3 | ecotic. | 32 | 0.17 | 0 min |
| #4 | Bollejeger | 24 | 0.24 | 0 min |
| #5 | E-Bony | 23 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | druestar | +4.26 | 66 | 53 |
| #2 | Bollejeger | +2.47 | 61 | 53 |
| #3 | Subj9cT | +1.93 | 88 | 51 |
| #4 | madzu | +0.98 | 67 | 50 |
| #5 | Beethoven | +0.75 | 90 | 64 |





