








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1325 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 511 matches | ||
| Faceit | 111 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 34 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




16 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6077 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,768 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1777 | 18% |
| Smokes | 3641 | 37% |
| HE Grenades | 3128 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 1222 | 13% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,105,789 of utility $148 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 245 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | gB | 51% | 84 |
| #2 | kevin | 50% | 118 |
| #3 | conor | 48% | 112 |
| #4 | Iced | 47% | 149 |
| #5 | ☁ Abracadabra | 46% | 333 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ☁ Abracadabra | 7 | 0.0010 |
| #2 | kevin | 7 | 0.0027 |
| #3 | Words | 3 | 0.0011 |
| #4 | conor | 2 | 0.0008 |
| #5 | BOT Brass | 2 | 0.0015 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | A|B | 524 | 0.48 | 17 min |
| #2 | Words | 489 | 0.18 | 15 min |
| #3 | Iced | 447 | 0.14 | 13 min |
| #4 | ☁ Abracadabra | 381 | 0.05 | 9 min |
| #5 | conor | 356 | 0.15 | 10 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kevin | +2.37 | 77 | 67 |
| #2 | conor | +1.72 | 74 | 73 |
| #3 | BOT FrAg | +0.80 | 74 | 46 |
| #4 | A|B | +0.41 | 22 | 87 |
| #5 | gB | +0.14 | 61 | 71 |





