








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 543 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 578 matches | ||
| Wingman | 13 matches | ||
| Premier | 6 matches | ||
| Renown | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 5 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6492 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 21,947 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4847 | 22% |
| Smokes | 4945 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 5859 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 6296 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,304,476 of utility $156 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 880 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | s1mple's son | 58% | 71 |
| #2 | Galileo | 55% | 80 |
| #3 | Steph ♡ | 49% | 162 |
| #4 | VNTY | Xijing Ping Peek | 47% | 49 |
| #5 | Rad1o | 46% | 101 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Galileo | 55% | 80 |
| #3 | Steph ♡ | 49% | 162 |
| #4 | VNTY | Xijing Ping Peek | 47% | 49 |
| #5 | Rad1o | 46% | 101 |
| #6 | JaSaTo | 45% | 55 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | s1mple's son | 5 | 0.0031 |
| #2 | Galileo | 4 | 0.0022 |
| #3 | JaSaTo | 2 | 0.0016 |
| #4 | VNTY | Xijing Ping Peek | 1 | 0.0009 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Steph ♡ | 782 | 0.22 | 23 min |
| #2 | Rad1o | 344 | 0.15 | 10 min |
| #3 | JaSaTo | 296 | 0.24 | 9 min |
| #4 | Galileo | 234 | 0.13 | 6 min |
| #5 | s1mple's son | 113 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | s1mple's son | +1.64 | 83 | 61 |
| #2 | Steph ♡ | +1.58 | 81 | 71 |
| #3 | JaSaTo | +0.88 | 78 | 77 |
| #4 | VNTY | Xijing Ping Peek | +0.10 | 80 | 65 |
| #5 | Hatch | -0.15 | 74 | 59 |





