








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 119 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 44 matches | ||
| Wingman | 36 matches | ||
| Faceit | 34 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
989 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,175 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1464 | 35% |
| Smokes | 937 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 760 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 1014 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $770,313 of utility $294 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 157 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Guppy)) | 78% | 9 |
| #2 | Tumpe | 73% | 11 |
| #3 | tenquu | 67% | 9 |
| #4 | lev1z | 57% | 7 |
| #5 | kuffo | 56% | 9 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #12 | Runosmäe Raineri | 35% | 31 |
| #13 | Elekunmulukku | 33% | 9 |
| #14 | Davyd | 30% | 10 |
| #15 | Tumppu | 25% | 12 |
| #16 | HOG RIDER | 20% | 10 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Runosmäe Raineri | 1 | 0.0015 |
| #2 | Tumpe | 1 | 0.0039 |
| #3 | ozzu12 | 1 | 0.0043 |
| #4 | HOG RIDER | 1 | 0.0048 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | koira | 64 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #2 | EuroShopper(ES) | 61 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #3 | Mayonis | 57 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| #4 | Runosmäe Raineri | 51 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #5 | Tumpe | 38 | 0.15 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tumpe | +5.90 | 83 | 68 |
| #2 | ozzu12 | +2.53 | 83 | 68 |
| #3 | tenquu | +1.22 | 60 | 62 |
| #4 | Davyd | +1.17 | 74 | 62 |
| #5 | Mayonis | +0.65 | 69 | 71 |





