








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 726 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 200 matches | ||
| Wingman | 36 matches | ||
| Faceit | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2562 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,524 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2369 | 43% |
| Smokes | 1612 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 967 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 576 | 10% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,181,389 of utility $194 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 559 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Yeetus | 10 | 0.0046 |
| #2 | Jeg er mongosexuel | 3 | 0.0033 |
| #3 | MR.Miljøteknikk | 2 | 0.0042 |
| #4 | Gimle | 1 | 0.0016 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Yeetus | 245 | 0.11 | 6 min |
| #2 | Jeg er mongosexuel | 98 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| #3 | Gimle | 75 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| #4 | MR.Miljøteknikk | 55 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MR.Miljøteknikk | +2.16 | 61 | 60 |
| #2 | Yeetus | +0.67 | 54 | 60 |
| #3 | Gimle | +0.56 | 63 | 58 |
| #4 | nyborg9 | +0.41 | 54 | 52 |
| #5 | Jeg er mongosexuel | -1.17 | 42 | 45 |





