








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 624 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 217 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 23 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3092 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,275 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2238 | 24% |
| Smokes | 2204 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 2587 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 2246 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,106,704 of utility $172 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 23 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FVCKOFF | 67% | 36 |
| #2 | crespo | 59% | 66 |
| #3 | rolek.ka | 51% | 226 |
| #4 | haz | 51% | 297 |
| #5 | illegalRain | 50% | 121 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | haz | 51% | 297 |
| #5 | illegalRain | 50% | 121 |
| #6 | ⚡︎Balenciaga | 48% | 185 |
| #7 | banned storp1kk | 46% | 131 |
| #8 | VooDoo #Nightmare | 44% | 115 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | rolek.ka | 16 | 0.0034 |
| #2 | haz | 13 | 0.0021 |
| #3 | banned storp1kk | 11 | 0.0039 |
| #4 | VooDoo #Nightmare | 7 | 0.0029 |
| #5 | crespo | 5 | 0.0037 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | haz | 584 | 0.09 | 14 min |
| #2 | rolek.ka | 445 | 0.10 | 11 min |
| #3 | banned storp1kk | 338 | 0.12 | 8 min |
| #4 | ⚡︎Balenciaga | 280 | 0.07 | 7 min |
| #5 | VooDoo #Nightmare | 140 | 0.06 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | haz | +3.22 | 78 | 69 |
| #2 | -RaawR | +1.66 | 88 | 65 |
| #3 | ⚡︎Balenciaga | -0.34 | 85 | 59 |
| #4 | FVCKOFF | -1.09 | 69 | 57 |
| #5 | rolek.ka | -1.60 | 53 | 60 |





