








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 29 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




20 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
940 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,449 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1265 | 37% |
| Smokes | 910 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 880 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 394 | 11% |
Our logs show you have wasted $171,495 of utility $66 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 160 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Glymir' | 66% | 59 |
| #2 | Nicrolix | 62% | 21 |
| #3 | Hayto_ | 60% | 30 |
| #4 | Brukas | 56% | 18 |
| #5 | Amenouxx™ | 54% | 122 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Amenouxx™ | 15 | 0.0060 |
| #2 | Barbe Douce | 6 | 0.0063 |
| #3 | Brukas | 2 | 0.0052 |
| #4 | Glymir' | 1 | 0.0008 |
| #5 | Hayto_ | 1 | 0.0017 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Amenouxx™ | 462 | 0.18 | 11 min |
| #2 | Glymir' | 335 | 0.28 | 9 min |
| #3 | Hayto_ | 59 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| #4 | Barbe Douce | 46 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #5 | Brukas | 33 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Glymir' | +7.89 | 89 | 78 |
| #2 | Amenouxx™ | +5.07 | 76 | 56 |
| #3 | Nicrolix | -0.77 | 72 | 38 |
| #4 | Hayto_ | -1.85 | 61 | 58 |
| #5 | Barbe Douce | -2.19 | 48 | 43 |





