








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 821 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 346 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 45 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 45 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 16 matches | ||
| Faceit | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 41 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




77 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7110 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,116 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3950 | 33% |
| Smokes | 3760 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 922 | 8% |
| Molotovs | 3484 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,227,320 of utility $120 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 969 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | tonesss | 78% | 40 |
| #2 | flamming sandwhich | 70% | 115 |
| #3 | ✪ RIDGBAK | 69% | 106 |
| #4 | t0ne- | 68% | 423 |
| #5 | Dack♛ | 65% | 26 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | t0ne- | 113 | 0.0133 |
| #2 | cazzzq | 33 | 0.0118 |
| #3 | ✪ RIDGBAK | 33 | 0.0147 |
| #4 | flamming sandwhich | 24 | 0.0106 |
| #5 | Dack♛ | 12 | 0.0245 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | t0ne- | 2182 | 0.26 | 48 min |
| #2 | flamming sandwhich | 1207 | 0.53 | 28 min |
| #3 | ✪ RIDGBAK | 468 | 0.21 | 11 min |
| #4 | cazzzq | 308 | 0.11 | 7 min |
| #5 | Treken | 269 | 0.42 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | proxy | +4.78 | 89 | 56 |
| #2 | t0ne- | +2.41 | 95 | 60 |
| #3 | tonesss | +1.79 | 84 | 61 |
| #4 | ✪ RIDGBAK | +1.56 | 75 | 60 |
| #5 | flamming sandwhich | +1.27 | 69 | 72 |





