








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 4 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 361 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 171 matches | ||
| Faceit | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 17 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




29 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4656 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 28,490 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7179 | 25% |
| Smokes | 6516 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 7542 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 7253 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $174,504 of utility $12 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 51 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mr. Happy | 47% | 130 |
| #2 | OS COTAS- Orelhas^^ | 46% | 149 |
| #3 | 啊哈哈鸭 | 46% | 195 |
| #4 | «Pjay_caxinas» | 46% | 425 |
| #5 | . | 44% | 133 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | Neves PvZ | 42% | 179 |
| #7 | André⭐MVP⭐ P i t a m o i a | 39% | 54 |
| #8 | PJAY_CAXINAS | 38% | 55 |
| #9 | raquerson | 38% | 76 |
| #10 | Bála | 37% | 46 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | «Pjay_caxinas» | 16 | 0.0018 |
| #2 | OS COTAS- Orelhas^^ | 16 | 0.0049 |
| #3 | 啊哈哈鸭 | 12 | 0.0029 |
| #4 | Mr. Happy | 11 | 0.0041 |
| #5 | raquerson | 11 | 0.0067 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | «Pjay_caxinas» | 2010 | 0.22 | 50 min |
| #2 | Mr. Happy | 623 | 0.23 | 14 min |
| #3 | OS COTAS- Orelhas^^ | 352 | 0.11 | 10 min |
| #4 | raquerson | 349 | 0.21 | 8 min |
| #5 | PJAY_CAXINAS | 282 | 0.25 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Neves PvZ | +2.07 | 66 | 55 |
| #2 | OS COTAS- Orelhas^^ | +1.68 | 63 | 67 |
| #3 | . | +1.28 | 80 | 63 |
| #4 | 啊哈哈鸭 | +0.33 | 79 | 23 |
| #5 | raquerson | +0.17 | 51 | 65 |





