








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 14 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 26 matches | ||
| Premier | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
469 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,585 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 364 | 23% |
| Smokes | 505 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 386 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 330 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $237,406 of utility $149 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ma1N∼ | 38% | 21 |
| #2 | wpn Blur | 31% | 26 |
| #3 | _RevisionCS | 30% | 60 |
| #4 | MaceGang | 25% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ma1N∼ | 38% | 21 |
| #2 | wpn Blur | 31% | 26 |
| #3 | _RevisionCS | 30% | 60 |
| #4 | MaceGang | 25% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | _RevisionCS | 2 | 0.0016 |
| #2 | MaceGang | 1 | 0.0031 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | _RevisionCS | 221 | 0.18 | 5 min |
| #2 | wpn Blur | 79 | 0.15 | 3 min |
| #3 | ma1N∼ | 55 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| #4 | MaceGang | 33 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ma1N∼ | +1.50 | 66 | 68 |
| #2 | _RevisionCS | +0.13 | 70 | 60 |
| #3 | MaceGang | +0.09 | 61 | 62 |
| #4 | wpn Blur | -0.06 | 73 | 63 |
| #5 | Coolbreeze935 | -2.99 | 46 | 40 |





