








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1158 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 163 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 67 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 55 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 55 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 23 matches | ||
| Premier | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 4 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 57 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




44 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2422 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,099 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1708 | 24% |
| Smokes | 1121 | 16% |
| HE Grenades | 1925 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 2345 | 33% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,431,533 of utility $141 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1629 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | DurryMuncha | 37% | 57 |
| #5 | Zach2626 | 36% | 61 |
| #6 | Twitch - ConSulGaming | 33% | 33 |
| #7 | peachybreadyt | 31% | 146 |
| #8 | Scawt | 26% | 62 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Manyen Mcilroy | 258 | 0.07 | 5 min |
| #2 | Sullie | 194 | 0.08 | 5 min |
| #3 | DurryMuncha | 164 | 0.15 | 4 min |
| #4 | peachybreadyt | 126 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| #5 | Zach2626 | 114 | 0.09 | 3 min |





