








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 143 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 246 matches | ||
| Faceit | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 18 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




28 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3017 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,774 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1788 | 20% |
| Smokes | 2709 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 2491 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 1786 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $895,748 of utility $148 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 329 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | -m1ssst | 63% | 16 |
| #2 | Izzac | 59% | 56 |
| #3 | Peter Lyle | 57% | 44 |
| #4 | maTias | 55% | 38 |
| #5 | Harley Quinn ღ | 50% | 32 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Izzac | 59% | 56 |
| #3 | Peter Lyle | 57% | 44 |
| #4 | maTias | 55% | 38 |
| #5 | Harley Quinn ღ | 50% | 32 |
| #6 | Jinchūriki | 42% | 78 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Izzac | 8 | 0.0069 |
| #2 | maTias | 4 | 0.0052 |
| #3 | Jinchūriki | 2 | 0.0013 |
| #4 | Peter Lyle | 1 | 0.0011 |
| #5 | Harley Quinn ღ | 1 | 0.0015 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Peter Lyle | 136 | 0.15 | 3 min |
| #2 | Izzac | 106 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #3 | Jinchūriki | 98 | 0.06 | 3 min |
| #4 | maTias | 46 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #5 | Harley Quinn ღ | 41 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | -m1ssst | +2.00 | 84 | 53 |
| #2 | Izzac | +1.38 | 75 | 58 |
| #3 | Twitch/Holtietv | +1.07 | 76 | 54 |
| #4 | Harley Quinn ღ | -0.61 | 62 | 70 |
| #5 | maTias | -1.73 | 73 | 59 |





