








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 89 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 166 matches | ||
| Faceit | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 21 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




16 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2586 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,312 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2429 | 26% |
| Smokes | 2421 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 1992 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 2470 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $321,475 of utility $73 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 69 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | stewiez | 65% | 31 |
| #2 | arel -n&b- | 64% | 11 |
| #3 | trigo | 59% | 59 |
| #4 | hildao | 57% | 129 |
| #5 | AloW | 57% | 128 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | hildao | 57% | 129 |
| #5 | AloW | 57% | 128 |
| #6 | fã do colo | 56% | 16 |
| #7 | tresde | 56% | 36 |
| #8 | d1rektt | 55% | 76 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hildao | 12 | 0.0046 |
| #2 | AloW | 6 | 0.0023 |
| #3 | d1rektt | 3 | 0.0020 |
| #4 | trigo | 2 | 0.0017 |
| #5 | arel -n&b- | 2 | 0.0093 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hildao | 412 | 0.16 | 11 min |
| #2 | d1rektt | 246 | 0.16 | 6 min |
| #3 | AloW | 198 | 0.08 | 5 min |
| #4 | trigo | 195 | 0.16 | 6 min |
| #5 | tresde | 147 | 0.19 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | wizardd | +2.20 | 79 | 71 |
| #2 | stewiez | +1.21 | 68 | 73 |
| #3 | hildao | +1.12 | 72 | 67 |
| #4 | d1rektt | +1.04 | 71 | 65 |
| #5 | arel -n&b- | +0.26 | 65 | 62 |





