










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 7 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 4 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 5 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
218 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 483 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 106 | 22% |
| Smokes | 108 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 157 | 33% |
| Molotovs | 112 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $94,609 of utility $243 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 45 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | the meanMachine | 67% | 9 |
| #2 | zadron | 60% | 5 |
| #3 | ✪ BRÜTΔL | 55% | 20 |
| #4 | 🎀 𝕴𝖓𝖗𝖊𝖆𝖑 | 54% | 13 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | the meanMachine | 67% | 9 |
| #2 | zadron | 60% | 5 |
| #3 | ✪ BRÜTΔL | 55% | 20 |
| #4 | 🎀 𝕴𝖓𝖗𝖊𝖆𝖑 | 54% | 13 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 🎀 𝕴𝖓𝖗𝖊𝖆𝖑 | 1 | 0.0036 |
| #2 | zadron | 1 | 0.0088 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 🎀 𝕴𝖓𝖗𝖊𝖆𝖑 | 33 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| #2 | the meanMachine | 25 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| #3 | ✪ BRÜTΔL | 21 | 0.05 | 0 min |
| #4 | zadron | 7 | 0.06 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | the meanMachine | +3.09 | 84 | 70 |
| #2 | zadron | +1.64 | 79 | 72 |
| #3 | 🎀 𝕴𝖓𝖗𝖊𝖆𝖑 | +0.85 | 68 | 54 |
| #4 | Barcode. (: | +0.69 | 82 | 60 |
| #5 | ✪ BRÜTΔL | -3.26 | 55 | 46 |





