








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 522 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Nuke | 466 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 280 matches | ||
| Premier | 174 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




113 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
12991 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,020 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1903 | 32% |
| Smokes | 1015 | 17% |
| HE Grenades | 2769 | 46% |
| Molotovs | 333 | 6% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,517,817 of utility $120 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2038 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | John Pork | 50% | 121 |
| #2 | i see a dog i pet it | 48% | 126 |
| #3 | lily | 45% | 130 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | John Pork | 50% | 121 |
| #2 | i see a dog i pet it | 48% | 126 |
| #3 | lily | 45% | 130 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | lily | 66 | 0.0261 |
| #2 | John Pork | 14 | 0.0059 |
| #3 | i see a dog i pet it | 4 | 0.0017 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | lily | 233 | 0.09 | 5 min |
| #2 | John Pork | 110 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| #3 | i see a dog i pet it | 14 | 0.01 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | leandog | +3.83 | 77 | 26 |
| #2 | i see a dog i pet it | -1.62 | 61 | 28 |
| #3 | lily | -2.80 | 78 | 49 |
| #4 | John Pork | -2.94 | 36 | 38 |





