








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 180 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 46 matches | ||
| Wingman | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 10 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1230 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,678 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 523 | 20% |
| Smokes | 765 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 485 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 905 | 34% |
Our logs show you have wasted $428,504 of utility $202 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 4 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | denniskarbon | 48% | 63 |
| #2 | KongKasino | 47% | 58 |
| #3 | Duolingo | 46% | 13 |
| #4 | SupermarineSpitfire | 41% | 41 |
| #5 | sahns | 36% | 11 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Duolingo | 46% | 13 |
| #4 | SupermarineSpitfire | 41% | 41 |
| #5 | sahns | 36% | 11 |
| #6 | OliChappa ❤ | 33% | 12 |
| #7 | K0nics | 29% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | denniskarbon | 3 | 0.0023 |
| #2 | SupermarineSpitfire | 3 | 0.0033 |
| #3 | K0nics | 2 | 0.0121 |
| #4 | KongKasino | 1 | 0.0008 |
| #5 | Duolingo | 1 | 0.0038 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | denniskarbon | 116 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #2 | KongKasino | 67 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| #3 | SupermarineSpitfire | 64 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #4 | Duolingo | 31 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| #5 | K0nics | 27 | 0.16 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | K0nics | +5.20 | 87 | 42 |
| #2 | Cobra | +4.23 | 88 | 49 |
| #3 | Duolingo | +0.89 | 72 | 62 |
| #4 | OliChappa ❤ | +0.58 | 84 | 65 |
| #5 | denniskarbon | +0.48 | 73 | 44 |





