








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 859 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 249 matches | ||
| Faceit | 68 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 13 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3747 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 16,343 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 8123 | 50% |
| Smokes | 2295 | 14% |
| HE Grenades | 2122 | 13% |
| Molotovs | 3803 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $542,045 of utility $70 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 487 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | cye | 68% | 34 |
| #2 | Binetto | 67% | 30 |
| #3 | dunaz™ | 65% | 40 |
| #4 | zнускx | 64% | 33 |
| #5 | imbad_Marcoo | 60% | 20 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Binetto | 67% | 30 |
| #3 | dunaz™ | 65% | 40 |
| #4 | zнускx | 64% | 33 |
| #5 | imbad_Marcoo | 60% | 20 |
| #6 | Pilon | 53% | 19 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pilon | 2 | 0.0053 |
| #2 | dunaz™ | 1 | 0.0013 |
| #3 | zнускx | 1 | 0.0015 |
| #4 | imbad_Marcoo | 1 | 0.0026 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | zнускx | 98 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| #2 | cye | 86 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #3 | dunaz™ | 72 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #4 | Binetto | 57 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #5 | imbad_Marcoo | 40 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jepeto | +2.29 | 78 | 74 |
| #2 | Binetto | +0.56 | 71 | 46 |
| #3 | cye | +0.03 | 56 | 66 |
| #4 | dunaz™ | -0.79 | 44 | 59 |
| #5 | Pilon | -0.83 | 65 | 63 |





