








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 531 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 286 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 9 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




42 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4467 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,213 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2700 | 20% |
| Smokes | 3474 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 3485 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 3554 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $694,810 of utility $82 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 550 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hypnootis | 48% | 23 |
| #2 | C4tL1ght | 44% | 39 |
| #3 | Juhox | 43% | 44 |
| #4 | word.exe | 42% | 45 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hypnootis | 48% | 23 |
| #2 | C4tL1ght | 44% | 39 |
| #3 | Juhox | 43% | 44 |
| #4 | word.exe | 42% | 45 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hypnootis | 3 | 0.0063 |
| #2 | word.exe | 2 | 0.0022 |
| #3 | Juhox | 1 | 0.0011 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | word.exe | 163 | 0.18 | 5 min |
| #2 | Hypnootis | 67 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| #3 | Juhox | 40 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| #4 | C4tL1ght | 19 | 0.02 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Juhox | +1.67 | 74 | 55 |
| #2 | pöly 2 pelaaja | +1.20 | 80 | 58 |
| #3 | word.exe | +0.66 | 68 | 67 |
| #4 | Hypnootis | -3.16 | 41 | 62 |
| #5 | C4tL1ght | -3.90 | 58 | 31 |





