








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 59 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 35 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 5 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
468 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,450 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 279 | 19% |
| Smokes | 390 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 468 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 313 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $126,690 of utility $141 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 72 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪Loggee | 100% | 4 |
| #2 | ♥ JWalker ♥ | 89% | 9 |
| #3 | Player1 | 83% | 6 |
| #4 | Bongwater Brian | 83% | 6 |
| #5 | v1ggi | 75% | 8 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | Bjark1- | 56% | 16 |
| #10 | Pylsan never forget | 50% | 6 |
| #11 | DREDINN | 43% | 7 |
| #12 | TΘ🄶🄶i | 43% | 14 |
| #13 | Aprikosa | 33% | 3 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bjark1- | 1 | 0.0029 |
| #2 | v1ggi | 1 | 0.0060 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PlaymE | 83 | 0.21 | 2 min |
| #2 | ✪ eyziii | 76 | 0.17 | 3 min |
| #3 | DREDINN | 40 | 0.23 | 1 min |
| #4 | Pylsan never forget | 34 | 0.26 | 1 min |
| #5 | ♥ JWalker ♥ | 32 | 0.18 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪Loggee | +4.09 | 67 | 54 |
| #2 | Player1 | +2.11 | 53 | 59 |
| #3 | ☞E1n4r☜ | +1.53 | 74 | 67 |
| #4 | ♥ JWalker ♥ | +1.18 | 67 | 68 |
| #5 | Bjark1- | +1.15 | 47 | 71 |





