








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 668 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 378 matches | ||
| Premier | 51 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4722 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,542 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1644 | 14% |
| Smokes | 3159 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 3465 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 3274 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,470,362 of utility $142 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 32 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Noppae | 59% | 340 |
| #2 | Robbanii | 59% | 101 |
| #3 | Jore♦ | 57% | 161 |
| #4 | Twizah | 57% | 142 |
| #5 | Puupi00 | 57% | 291 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | 팬더 | 56% | 318 |
| #7 | Crock | 56% | 209 |
| #8 | кari | 53% | 108 |
| #9 | Juspe15 | 52% | 75 |
| #10 | kyyb | 49% | 37 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Puupi00 | 4 | 0.0006 |
| #2 | Noppae | 3 | 0.0004 |
| #3 | Jore♦ | 1 | 0.0003 |
| #4 | Twizah | 1 | 0.0003 |
| #5 | кari | 1 | 0.0004 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Puupi00 | 1150 | 0.18 | 39 min |
| #2 | Noppae | 1102 | 0.15 | 32 min |
| #3 | 팬더 | 993 | 0.14 | 30 min |
| #4 | Twizah | 966 | 0.32 | 32 min |
| #5 | Juspe15 | 372 | 0.22 | 11 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mad_Morski | +1.64 | 72 | 55 |
| #2 | кari | +1.14 | 85 | 61 |
| #3 | Twizah | +0.86 | 66 | 80 |
| #4 | Crock | +0.71 | 77 | 44 |
| #5 | 팬더 | +0.59 | 68 | 68 |





