








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 348 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 71 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 19 matches | ||
| Faceit | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




37 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3426 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,539 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5226 | 42% |
| Smokes | 3886 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 929 | 7% |
| Molotovs | 2498 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $368,237 of utility $68 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 154 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | zerk | 55% | 20 |
| #2 | 5ushi | 52% | 31 |
| #3 | Aghast | 51% | 72 |
| #4 | ergo | 50% | 14 |
| #5 | shovel.jpeg | 50% | 22 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mad3sto | 162 | 0.20 | 4 min |
| #2 | Choo Choo | 137 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #3 | Aghast | 137 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| #4 | zerk | 111 | 0.27 | 3 min |
| #5 | 5ushi | 70 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lekey Zeke | +4.20 | 77 | 69 |
| #2 | shovel.jpeg | +0.72 | 66 | 59 |
| #3 | mad3sto | +0.69 | 83 | 69 |
| #4 | m1nt | +0.53 | 80 | 41 |
| #5 | Aghast | +0.09 | 70 | 46 |





