










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1536 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 109 matches | ||
| Wingman | 81 matches | ||
| Faceit | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 33 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




26 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2494 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,005 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1590 | 26% |
| Smokes | 1413 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 1392 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 1610 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,118,983 of utility $275 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1354 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | noon136 | 85% | 13 |
| #2 | infinity_bush | 70% | 40 |
| #3 | Heinrich JΓ€ger | 68% | 34 |
| #4 | βͺ Shadox | Coach CSFR | 65% | 23 |
| #5 | BladeV | 61% | 82 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Heinrich JΓ€ger | 68% | 34 |
| #4 | βͺ Shadox | Coach CSFR | 65% | 23 |
| #5 | BladeV | 61% | 82 |
| #6 | haliuswQwQw | 57% | 21 |
| #7 | Luciffer* | 50% | 12 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | infinity_bush | 7 | 0.0083 |
| #2 | BladeV | 6 | 0.0039 |
| #3 | βͺ Shadox | Coach CSFR | 4 | 0.0086 |
| #4 | haliuswQwQw | 1 | 0.0022 |
| #5 | Luciffer* | 1 | 0.0036 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | infinity_bush | 177 | 0.21 | 4 min |
| #2 | haliuswQwQw | 110 | 0.24 | 3 min |
| #3 | βͺ Shadox | Coach CSFR | 67 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| #4 | Heinrich JΓ€ger | 48 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #5 | BladeV | 39 | 0.03 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Fluxi | +5.75 | 92 | 67 |
| #2 | infinity_bush | +4.75 | 71 | 58 |
| #3 | Luciffer* | +1.85 | 66 | 72 |
| #4 | haliuswQwQw | +1.54 | 62 | 79 |
| #5 | Heinrich JΓ€ger | +0.32 | 76 | 42 |





