








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 4 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
335 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 853 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 224 | 26% |
| Smokes | 216 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 181 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 232 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $116,812 of utility $158 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1 message into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | drago0n | 75% | 4 |
| #2 | thelench | 53% | 19 |
| #3 | starY | 50% | 2 |
| #4 | Skeletor | 41% | 27 |
| #5 | E-Girl Beater | 40% | 5 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Skeletor | 100 | 0.18 | 3 min |
| #2 | thelench | 46 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| #3 | Moolah Enjoyer | 14 | 0.03 | 0 min |
| #4 | E-Girl Beater | 12 | 0.13 | 0 min |
| #5 | drago0n | 9 | 0.13 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | drago0n | +4.59 | 78 | 73 |
| #2 | Stornilius | +2.59 | 60 | 46 |
| #3 | Skeletor | +1.84 | 65 | 53 |
| #4 | CoolGuy | +1.13 | 72 | 40 |
| #5 | QuietGuy | +0.54 | 77 | 48 |





