








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 4 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 26 matches | ||
| Premier | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1215 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,247 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 547 | 17% |
| Smokes | 908 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 899 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 893 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $526,216 of utility $171 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Yung | 63% | 96 |
| #2 | Wangaroo | 62% | 99 |
| #3 | Sear Without Fear | 60% | 124 |
| #4 | LucidiT | 58% | 89 |
| #5 | senior | 56% | 66 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | senior | 56% | 66 |
| #6 | Lamy | 38% | 8 |
| #7 | Stornilius | 31% | 16 |
| #8 | Moolah Enjoyer | 31% | 16 |
| #9 | Skeletor | 30% | 10 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | LucidiT | 4 | 0.0023 |
| #2 | Wangaroo | 3 | 0.0016 |
| #3 | Yung | 3 | 0.0016 |
| #4 | senior | 3 | 0.0024 |
| #5 | Sear Without Fear | 1 | 0.0004 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sear Without Fear | 403 | 0.17 | 12 min |
| #2 | Yung | 348 | 0.18 | 9 min |
| #3 | Wangaroo | 307 | 0.16 | 7 min |
| #4 | LucidiT | 224 | 0.13 | 7 min |
| #5 | senior | 195 | 0.16 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lamy | +2.25 | 83 | 51 |
| #2 | Sear Without Fear | +2.01 | 85 | 60 |
| #3 | LucidiT | +1.99 | 87 | 66 |
| #4 | Yung | +1.37 | 89 | 68 |
| #5 | Stornilius | +1.32 | 64 | 46 |





