








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1061 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 656 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 66 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 4 matches | ||
| Faceit | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 45 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




32 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8885 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 23,808 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 8234 | 35% |
| Smokes | 4236 | 18% |
| HE Grenades | 7998 | 34% |
| Molotovs | 3340 | 14% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,908,456 of utility $171 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1018 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | I will kms if I lose this match | 48% | 80 |
| #7 | TechTraxx | 47% | 51 |
| #8 | Sh4rKy | 46% | 52 |
| #9 | Mr. BurnS | 44% | 75 |
| #10 | SuPaNinaツS | 43% | 70 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | LennyS | 15 | 0.0029 |
| #2 | eye like come | 10 | 0.0043 |
| #3 | TechTraxx | 6 | 0.0057 |
| #4 | SuPaNinaツS | 4 | 0.0026 |
| #5 | Elli | 3 | 0.0017 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | LennyS | 790 | 0.15 | 22 min |
| #2 | Bernie | 274 | 0.19 | 7 min |
| #3 | eye like come | 233 | 0.10 | 6 min |
| #4 | I will kms if I lose this match | 226 | 0.13 | 4 min |
| #5 | SuPaNinaツS | 191 | 0.12 | 4 min |





