








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 957 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 315 matches | ||
| Wingman | 101 matches | ||
| Faceit | 99 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 21 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




64 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6357 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,515 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2413 | 23% |
| Smokes | 2290 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 3236 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 2576 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,985,584 of utility $163 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 232 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dibble | 59% | 54 |
| #2 | Tjallmikkal | 48% | 61 |
| #3 | Nozomi | 47% | 47 |
| #4 | ProPM | 45% | 80 |
| #5 | Nic | 41% | 70 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dibble | 59% | 54 |
| #2 | Tjallmikkal | 48% | 61 |
| #3 | Nozomi | 47% | 47 |
| #4 | ProPM | 45% | 80 |
| #5 | Nic | 41% | 70 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Nic | 12 | 0.0082 |
| #2 | Tjallmikkal | 4 | 0.0032 |
| #3 | Nozomi | 2 | 0.0021 |
| #4 | ProPM | 1 | 0.0007 |
| #5 | Dibble | 1 | 0.0009 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ProPM | 182 | 0.12 | 5 min |
| #2 | Dibble | 171 | 0.15 | 5 min |
| #3 | Nic | 156 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| #4 | Nozomi | 136 | 0.14 | 4 min |
| #5 | Tjallmikkal | 53 | 0.04 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dibble | +2.00 | 85 | 60 |
| #2 | Nozomi | +0.88 | 70 | 57 |
| #3 | Rascal | +0.75 | 71 | 42 |
| #4 | Tjallmikkal | +0.43 | 72 | 58 |
| #5 | ProPM | -0.34 | 71 | 58 |





