








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 65 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 60 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 15 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
664 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,309 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1949 | 37% |
| Smokes | 1255 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 1067 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 1038 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $278,505 of utility $110 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 117 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | papaJ | 61% | 18 |
| #2 | Blasian | 57% | 7 |
| #3 | Ken | 50% | 8 |
| #4 | Caffè Kat | 50% | 8 |
| #5 | ravi | 50% | 10 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | papaJ | 61% | 18 |
| #2 | Blasian | 57% | 7 |
| #3 | Ken | 50% | 8 |
| #4 | Caffè Kat | 50% | 8 |
| #5 | ravi | 50% | 10 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Caffè Kat | 4 | 0.0272 |
| #2 | papaJ | 2 | 0.0059 |
| #3 | Ken | 2 | 0.0124 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | papaJ | 95 | 0.28 | 2 min |
| #2 | Caffè Kat | 36 | 0.24 | 0 min |
| #3 | ravi | 25 | 0.11 | 0 min |
| #4 | Ken | 24 | 0.15 | 0 min |
| #5 | Blasian | 7 | 0.06 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ken | +2.20 | 46 | 34 |
| #2 | papaJ | +0.03 | 73 | 68 |
| #3 | Caffè Kat | -1.67 | 63 | 62 |
| #4 | ravi | -1.71 | 33 | 40 |
| #5 | Skadoosh | -1.95 | 17 | 66 |





