








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 616 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 109 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 57 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 55 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 18 matches | ||
| Faceit | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 70 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




19 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3893 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,149 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3162 | 24% |
| Smokes | 3927 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 2502 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 3558 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,154,129 of utility $137 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 102 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | ♕kingnem0^G | 59% | 22 |
| #7 | Jay | 57% | 21 |
| #8 | ☘️ Wushu_TV | 57% | 49 |
| #9 | 天上天下唯我独尊 | 56% | 39 |
| #10 | 2oldtogame | 46% | 84 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 2oldtogame | 474 | 0.27 | 11 min |
| #2 | ☘️ Wushu_TV | 254 | 0.25 | 7 min |
| #3 | Nickname | 188 | 0.06 | 5 min |
| #4 | Mr. Chairman | 118 | 0.04 | 3 min |
| #5 | K1ngBurrito | 99 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jay | +6.83 | 96 | 58 |
| #2 | 天上天下唯我独尊 | +2.96 | 70 | 60 |
| #3 | ♕kingnem0^G | +2.69 | 70 | 77 |
| #4 | Alpha | +2.41 | 75 | 59 |
| #5 | K1ngBurrito | +0.78 | 57 | 60 |





