










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 43 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 485 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




59 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3846 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,019 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1062 | 18% |
| Smokes | 1770 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 2273 | 38% |
| Molotovs | 914 | 15% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,590,364 of utility $135 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 18 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RoadTo30k | 58% | 53 |
| #2 | Rasta rat | 55% | 77 |
| #3 | bugs in your skin | 49% | 84 |
| #4 | thai green curry | 45% | 40 |
| #5 | milliampz | 44% | 89 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RoadTo30k | 58% | 53 |
| #2 | Rasta rat | 55% | 77 |
| #3 | bugs in your skin | 49% | 84 |
| #4 | thai green curry | 45% | 40 |
| #5 | milliampz | 44% | 89 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bugs in your skin | 19 | 0.0112 |
| #2 | milliampz | 5 | 0.0026 |
| #3 | Rasta rat | 5 | 0.0031 |
| #4 | RoadTo30k | 4 | 0.0036 |
| #5 | thai green curry | 4 | 0.0051 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | milliampz | 229 | 0.12 | 8 min |
| #2 | Rasta rat | 205 | 0.13 | 5 min |
| #3 | thai green curry | 81 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #4 | bugs in your skin | 71 | 0.04 | 2 min |
| #5 | RoadTo30k | 18 | 0.02 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | LumpyCrabZ | +2.61 | 73 | 34 |
| #2 | Rasta rat | +0.09 | 58 | 59 |
| #3 | thai green curry | -0.89 | 53 | 23 |
| #4 | RoadTo30k | -1.06 | 64 | 32 |
| #5 | milliampz | -1.86 | 59 | 59 |





