








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 940 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 307 matches | ||
| Faceit | 84 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 58 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




68 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5732 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 24,013 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 9204 | 38% |
| Smokes | 6939 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 3356 | 14% |
| Molotovs | 4514 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,488,519 of utility $117 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1314 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bertige | 48 | 0.0056 |
| #2 | chad warden | 27 | 0.0039 |
| #3 | Xira | 20 | 0.0051 |
| #4 | JC Grab | 19 | 0.0024 |
| #5 | Major Mike Hunt-Hurtz | 12 | 0.0056 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | chad warden | 1314 | 0.19 | 32 min |
| #2 | JC Grab | 1306 | 0.17 | 29 min |
| #3 | Xira | 641 | 0.16 | 15 min |
| #4 | Bertige | 576 | 0.07 | 13 min |
| #5 | Major Mike Hunt-Hurtz | 191 | 0.09 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bertige | +4.95 | 87 | 54 |
| #2 | Xira | +1.97 | 81 | 58 |
| #3 | Austian0 | -0.30 | 71 | 68 |
| #4 | JC Grab | -1.83 | 61 | 58 |
| #5 | chad warden | -1.84 | 35 | 54 |





