








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 2887 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 909 matches | ||
| Faceit | 211 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 10 matches | ||
| Wingman | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 77 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




92 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
13036 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 57,379 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 15711 | 27% |
| Smokes | 13717 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 13448 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 14503 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,476,580 of utility $135 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 4542 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Inumaki | 54% | 117 |
| #2 | ♠S I C♠ | 53% | 98 |
| #3 | Endzeit | 52% | 105 |
| #4 | sir.ap | 49% | 374 |
| #5 | vic | 49% | 61 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | ♠S I C♠ | 53% | 98 |
| #3 | Endzeit | 52% | 105 |
| #4 | sir.ap | 49% | 374 |
| #5 | vic | 49% | 61 |
| #6 | Gunzsy | 49% | 70 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sir.ap | 26 | 0.0033 |
| #2 | Endzeit | 9 | 0.0040 |
| #3 | ♠S I C♠ | 7 | 0.0034 |
| #4 | Inumaki | 4 | 0.0016 |
| #5 | vic | 4 | 0.0031 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sir.ap | 1299 | 0.16 | 33 min |
| #2 | Inumaki | 411 | 0.17 | 9 min |
| #3 | Endzeit | 369 | 0.16 | 7 min |
| #4 | ♠S I C♠ | 238 | 0.11 | 6 min |
| #5 | vic | 118 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | qeak | +1.01 | 52 | 67 |
| #2 | sir.ap | +0.57 | 47 | 57 |
| #3 | Endzeit | +0.13 | 28 | 53 |
| #4 | ♠S I C♠ | -0.17 | 56 | 35 |
| #5 | vic | -0.95 | 44 | 45 |





