








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 466 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 707 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Faceit | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 30 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




21 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4200 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 20,571 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4390 | 21% |
| Smokes | 5165 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 5213 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 5803 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,482,534 of utility $96 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 21 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Señor Vac | 63% | 48 |
| #2 | Pensionars | 52% | 83 |
| #3 | Meitene Zeltene | 52% | 60 |
| #4 | HeadHunter:* | 50% | 529 |
| #5 | RikiTan | 49% | 79 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Señor Vac | +3.13 | 75 | 70 |
| #2 | HeadHunter:* | +3.03 | 78 | 76 |
| #3 | RikiTan | +2.84 | 77 | 71 |
| #4 | ♥UwU♥ | +2.74 | 77 | 71 |
| #5 | P. Diddy | +2.07 | 54 | 39 |





