








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 25 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 126 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 10 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




19 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1486 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,344 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1404 | 32% |
| Smokes | 1345 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 564 | 13% |
| Molotovs | 1031 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $138,357 of utility $39 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 119 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 𝙎𝙝𝙥𝙤𝙤𝙣 | 50% | 115 |
| #2 | Jay | 50% | 74 |
| #3 | Mr Nesw | 49% | 73 |
| #4 | limpbizkitfan3000 | 47% | 15 |
| #5 | Ki11erc00kie | 42% | 53 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Mr Nesw | 49% | 73 |
| #4 | limpbizkitfan3000 | 47% | 15 |
| #5 | Ki11erc00kie | 42% | 53 |
| #6 | DrHippo | 40% | 10 |
| #7 | Wazz | 33% | 12 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 𝙎𝙝𝙥𝙤𝙤𝙣 | 13 | 0.0056 |
| #2 | Jay | 9 | 0.0060 |
| #3 | Mr Nesw | 7 | 0.0047 |
| #4 | Wazz | 5 | 0.0192 |
| #5 | Ki11erc00kie | 3 | 0.0028 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 𝙎𝙝𝙥𝙤𝙤𝙣 | 273 | 0.12 | 5 min |
| #2 | Mr Nesw | 155 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| #3 | Ki11erc00kie | 128 | 0.12 | 4 min |
| #4 | Jay | 69 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| #5 | DrHippo | 35 | 0.18 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jay | +3.77 | 81 | 49 |
| #2 | DrHippo | +3.24 | 92 | 68 |
| #3 | Mr Nesw | +0.41 | 75 | 40 |
| #4 | 𝙎𝙝𝙥𝙤𝙤𝙣 | -0.09 | 73 | 57 |
| #5 | TheFattNutt | -0.82 | 74 | 50 |





