








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 283 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 115 matches | ||
| Premier | 82 matches | ||
| Wingman | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 15 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




15 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2867 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,545 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1552 | 21% |
| Smokes | 2126 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 2010 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 1857 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $861,754 of utility $150 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 319 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jeraanke | 79% | 29 |
| #2 | toast | 71% | 41 |
| #3 | HuGo | 68% | 19 |
| #4 | King Sooze♛ | 64% | 72 |
| #5 | Gen1e | 63% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Skitse | 11 | 0.0160 |
| #2 | Washed Orkaz | 5 | 0.0023 |
| #3 | King Sooze♛ | 4 | 0.0025 |
| #4 | toast | 1 | 0.0011 |
| #5 | Biomech | 1 | 0.0018 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Washed Orkaz | +2.88 | 86 | 62 |
| #2 | Gen1e | +2.72 | 81 | 62 |
| #3 | ΛSTE | +1.57 | 75 | 59 |
| #4 | toast | +1.33 | 78 | 49 |
| #5 | HuGo | +1.29 | 67 | 65 |





