








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 509 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 650 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 7 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 51 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




59 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4626 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 18,664 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5089 | 27% |
| Smokes | 4953 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 3543 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 5079 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $771,766 of utility $43 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 440 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Duranthecrispy27 | 51% | 57 |
| #2 | Sac-Religious | 48% | 364 |
| #3 | l i l o | 44% | 130 |
| #4 | CrazyIdiot | 43% | 87 |
| #5 | Wilkes | 42% | 143 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sac-Religious | 46 | 0.0059 |
| #2 | Wilkes | 9 | 0.0031 |
| #3 | l i l o | 8 | 0.0029 |
| #4 | Duranthecrispy27 | 5 | 0.0044 |
| #5 | CrazyIdiot | 3 | 0.0016 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sac-Religious | +4.09 | 45 | 68 |
| #2 | Wilkes | +1.98 | 50 | 70 |
| #3 | l i l o | +1.01 | 67 | 40 |
| #4 | Duranthecrispy27 | -0.04 | 38 | 25 |
| #5 | CrazyIdiot | -1.56 | 43 | 46 |





