








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1049 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 260 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 130 matches | ||
| Wingman | 90 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 55 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 46 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 25 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




39 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7292 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,456 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1790 | 13% |
| Smokes | 3704 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 2923 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 5039 | 37% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,605,776 of utility $166 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1803 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | misty | 61% | 51 |
| #2 | Arkhè | 55% | 146 |
| #3 | Gabiii | 52% | 44 |
| #4 | Sitri | 51% | 41 |
| #5 | GuroPup | 50% | 179 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | XX | 48% | 42 |
| #10 | NeonKate | 47% | 64 |
| #11 | ⛧𝖂𝖎𝖓𝖙𝖊𝖗⛧ | 46% | 65 |
| #12 | 9 | 44% | 63 |
| #13 | puppygirl sel :3 | 43% | 77 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Valorie | 9 | 0.0018 |
| #2 | GuroPup | 8 | 0.0022 |
| #3 | PortalTurret | 8 | 0.0023 |
| #4 | misty | 7 | 0.0072 |
| #5 | D3X | 5 | 0.0033 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Arkhè | 262 | 0.11 | 7 min |
| #2 | PortalTurret | 251 | 0.07 | 6 min |
| #3 | GuroPup | 233 | 0.06 | 5 min |
| #4 | Valorie | 188 | 0.04 | 4 min |
| #5 | Sitri | 108 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Arkhè | +2.78 | 60 | 57 |
| #2 | D3X | +2.75 | 71 | 41 |
| #3 | Sitri | +2.54 | 86 | 55 |
| #4 | misty | +2.49 | 52 | 56 |
| #5 | XX | +2.43 | 71 | 22 |





