








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 161 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 39 matches | ||
| Premier | 18 matches | ||
| Wingman | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
721 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,668 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 374 | 14% |
| Smokes | 723 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 815 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 756 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $433,900 of utility $194 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1 message into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Atski | 61% | 18 |
| #2 | Filpsterr | 60% | 35 |
| #3 | Munkken | 60% | 60 |
| #4 | NTHasu | 58% | 24 |
| #5 | Rattle | 54% | 24 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #13 | konffen | 25% | 8 |
| #14 | Ray | 25% | 12 |
| #15 | KorvN #VAC | 23% | 13 |
| #16 | DAshotRK | 22% | 9 |
| #17 | Sjovall | 21% | 14 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Viagraddict | 5 | 0.0065 |
| #2 | affepoika | 5 | 0.0065 |
| #3 | Munkken | 3 | 0.0025 |
| #4 | KorvN #VAC | 3 | 0.0110 |
| #5 | Atski | 2 | 0.0050 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | affepoika | 91 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| #2 | Viagraddict | 73 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #3 | Sjovall | 71 | 0.25 | 2 min |
| #4 | Filpsterr | 69 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #5 | Rattle | 67 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KorvN #VAC | +3.63 | 53 | 65 |
| #2 | Filpsterr | +2.49 | 69 | 67 |
| #3 | Ray | +2.36 | 79 | 73 |
| #4 | NTHasu | +1.92 | 77 | 56 |
| #5 | DAshotRK | +1.04 | 70 | 64 |





