








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1109 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 483 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 35 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




122 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8477 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 18,265 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5338 | 29% |
| Smokes | 4663 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 3756 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 4508 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,550,995 of utility $121 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1103 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | zapp | 78% | 36 |
| #2 | Kai | 70% | 322 |
| #3 | LODA | 69% | 95 |
| #4 | CRAP@LAN | 68% | 125 |
| #5 | piwi | 68% | 74 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kai | 27 | 0.0040 |
| #2 | _Hiru | 23 | 0.0097 |
| #3 | piwi | 17 | 0.0132 |
| #4 | LODA | 8 | 0.0042 |
| #5 | zapp | 8 | 0.0147 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Valkyriecr 🦋 | +4.38 | 86 | 60 |
| #2 | Kai | +3.31 | 77 | 56 |
| #3 | piwi | +2.72 | 75 | 60 |
| #4 | PugLife | +2.50 | 75 | 61 |
| #5 | CryingFox | +1.96 | 84 | 58 |





