








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 145 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 174 matches | ||
| Faceit | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Esplay | 2 matches | 2,064 | |
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 5 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




32 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3139 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,237 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1895 | 30% |
| Smokes | 1144 | 18% |
| HE Grenades | 1793 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 1405 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $971,846 of utility $191 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 317 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | ツ ✞♛SheriffeN♛✞ツ | 56% | 54 |
| #6 | Peta | 54% | 71 |
| #7 | Dreamer | 47% | 171 |
| #8 | EIK NX | 44% | 27 |
| #9 | Sigge | 44% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | § | +3.44 | 86 | 52 |
| #2 | Karl -iwnl- | +2.84 | 81 | 72 |
| #3 | why u have to be mad? | +1.29 | 93 | 59 |
| #4 | Bombastik Sid Eye (Humb1e) | +0.61 | 64 | 58 |
| #5 | EIK NX | +0.35 | 74 | 58 |





