








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 633 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 491 matches | ||
| Premier | 123 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 20 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 41 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6857 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 27,461 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 8378 | 31% |
| Smokes | 6562 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 5708 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 6813 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,595,807 of utility $101 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 454 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | skiima | 54% | 72 |
| #2 | chz.! | 52% | 102 |
| #3 | . | 51% | 88 |
| #4 | pain | 51% | 186 |
| #5 | boomzera | 49% | 132 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | clown | 7 | 0.0022 |
| #2 | . | 7 | 0.0038 |
| #3 | syn | 6 | 0.0035 |
| #4 | pain | 3 | 0.0008 |
| #5 | boomzera | 3 | 0.0011 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jesus | 1029 | 0.19 | 25 min |
| #2 | pain | 659 | 0.17 | 14 min |
| #3 | . | 459 | 0.25 | 13 min |
| #4 | clown | 393 | 0.12 | 8 min |
| #5 | boomzera | 375 | 0.14 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | pain | +1.77 | 79 | 70 |
| #2 | nik | +1.75 | 84 | 69 |
| #3 | EintrachtFrankfurt | +1.51 | 67 | 66 |
| #4 | . | +0.97 | 74 | 69 |
| #5 | chz.! | +0.45 | 80 | 65 |





