








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 22 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 179 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 32 matches | ||
| Faceit | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 13 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3635 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,898 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2455 | 19% |
| Smokes | 3521 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 3942 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 2980 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,076,159 of utility $118 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 89 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | HeLLz | 65% | 26 |
| #2 | penile_spasm1348906 | 65% | 23 |
| #3 | Ultima | 63% | 24 |
| #4 | Cloudz | 60% | 30 |
| #5 | dal2n | 59% | 81 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | penile_spasm1348906 | +5.91 | 88 | 76 |
| #2 | cooter intruder | +3.04 | 77 | 75 |
| #3 | dal2n | +2.82 | 83 | 81 |
| #4 | Ultima | +2.47 | 94 | 48 |
| #5 | John 3:16 | +0.63 | 72 | 70 |





