








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 842 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 242 matches | ||
| Premier | 122 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 68 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 11 matches | ||
| Wingman | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 67 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




47 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5704 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 27,947 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7019 | 25% |
| Smokes | 7428 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 7146 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 6354 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,381,774 of utility $95 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 179 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | guardian | 58% | 130 |
| #2 | [Unex] spreGGo | 57% | 69 |
| #3 | Private Kiwi | 56% | 180 |
| #4 | 0nk3lz | 50% | 608 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | guardian | 58% | 130 |
| #2 | [Unex] spreGGo | 57% | 69 |
| #3 | Private Kiwi | 56% | 180 |
| #4 | 0nk3lz | 50% | 608 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 0nk3lz | 26 | 0.0021 |
| #2 | guardian | 4 | 0.0016 |
| #3 | Private Kiwi | 3 | 0.0008 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 0nk3lz | 997 | 0.08 | 26 min |
| #2 | [Unex] spreGGo | 138 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| #3 | guardian | 118 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| #4 | Private Kiwi | 84 | 0.02 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | guardian | +3.58 | 80 | 50 |
| #2 | Private Kiwi | +0.92 | 62 | 48 |
| #3 | {Bro} Hendunger | +0.35 | 64 | 67 |
| #4 | 0nk3lz | -0.02 | 54 | 72 |
| #5 | [Unex] spreGGo | -3.47 | 11 | 50 |





