








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 11 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 46 matches | ||
| Wingman | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




0 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Your loyalty is impressive.
536 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,218 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 670 | 30% |
| Smokes | 579 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 502 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 467 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $111,249 of utility $86 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MickeyBoy | 62% | 42 |
| #2 | F///CKELMANN | 60% | 53 |
| #3 | Aqpi | 58% | 24 |
| #4 | kett | 43% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MickeyBoy | 62% | 42 |
| #2 | F///CKELMANN | 60% | 53 |
| #3 | Aqpi | 58% | 24 |
| #4 | kett | 43% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | F///CKELMANN | 151 | 0.13 | 5 min |
| #2 | MickeyBoy | 69 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #3 | Aqpi | 66 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| #4 | kett | 17 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Aqpi | +3.59 | 86 | 64 |
| #2 | F///CKELMANN | +2.31 | 73 | 69 |
| #3 | MickeyBoy | -0.39 | 67 | 56 |
| #4 | Strosx | -1.10 | 71 | 66 |
| #5 | kett | -2.54 | 39 | 66 |





