








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 219 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 104 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 47 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 27 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show 10 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




16 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1661 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,312 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1177 | 16% |
| Smokes | 1614 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 2487 | 34% |
| Molotovs | 2034 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $634,431 of utility $134 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 75 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SaltyJoshe | 50% | 14 |
| #2 | X | 49% | 164 |
| #3 | ThatKidFromFortnite | 46% | 41 |
| #4 | 2024 Toyota Camry | 46% | 46 |
| #5 | hhunt.g | 44% | 115 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | X | 22 | 0.0065 |
| #2 | ThatKidFromFortnite | 8 | 0.0098 |
| #3 | hhunt.g | 3 | 0.0012 |
| #4 | 2024 Toyota Camry | 3 | 0.0031 |
| #5 | SaltyJoshe | 1 | 0.0033 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hhunt.g | 103 | 0.04 | 2 min |
| #2 | ThatKidFromFortnite | 92 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| #3 | 2024 Toyota Camry | 56 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #4 | X | 47 | 0.01 | 1 min |
| #5 | SaltyJoshe | 39 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 2024 Toyota Camry | +2.65 | 59 | 41 |
| #2 | X | +0.79 | 73 | 26 |
| #3 | hhunt.g | +0.34 | 29 | 27 |
| #4 | ThatKidFromFortnite | +0.21 | 76 | 44 |
| #5 | ajeppo | -0.89 | 40 | 52 |





