








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 32 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
230 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 278 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 41 | 15% |
| Smokes | 52 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 119 | 43% |
| Molotovs | 66 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $54,947 of utility $131 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 28 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kerm1t the frog | 37 | 0.17 | 1 min |
| #2 | Cloud1 | 22 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #3 | youghurt | 19 | 0.21 | 0 min |
| #4 | ★︎ T0XS1S | 9 | 0.09 | 0 min |
| #5 | AmyF1sh | 7 | 0.10 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cloud1 | +3.16 | 68 | 43 |
| #2 | AmyF1sh | +2.05 | 62 | 52 |
| #3 | youghurt | +1.80 | 59 | 50 |
| #4 | Kerm1t the frog | +1.08 | 74 | 51 |
| #5 | abc175XD | +0.37 | 68 | 38 |





