










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 0 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.

| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 60 matches | ||
| Wingman | 12 matches | ||
| Premier | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1292 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,760 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 759 | 28% |
| Smokes | 629 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 664 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 708 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $291,441 of utility $143 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 153 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Taiski | 80% | 5 |
| #2 | Freddie | 67% | 6 |
| #3 | PihL | 60% | 5 |
| #4 | Caspos1ke | 60% | 10 |
| #5 | v1per | 57% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Caspos1ke | 60% | 10 |
| #5 | v1per | 57% | 7 |
| #6 | farlig vuffer | 57% | 7 |
| #7 | Minkelicious^ | 45% | 11 |
| #8 | King T'Challa | 22% | 9 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Minkelicious^ | 49 | 0.22 | 2 min |
| #2 | PihL | 42 | 0.37 | 1 min |
| #3 | King T'Challa | 20 | 0.11 | 0 min |
| #4 | Caspos1ke | 18 | 0.09 | 0 min |
| #5 | farlig vuffer | 18 | 0.12 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PihL | +4.04 | 99 | 79 |
| #2 | Berner | +1.94 | 89 | 57 |
| #3 | King T'Challa | +0.90 | 80 | 59 |
| #4 | Taiski | +0.55 | 53 | 57 |
| #5 | farlig vuffer | +0.14 | 59 | 50 |





